Grinch 4.0: An IIoT RebootDecember 5, 2018
Although Whos down in Whoville love The Grinch a lot…
His cousin The Grump, of New York City, does NOT!
The Grinch had been tricked and betrayed his kind:
He needed a good kick in the behind.
The Grump hated Santa! The whole charity season!
If you ask why, he’ll harumph loudly the reason.
“My head’s screwed on tight and my shoes fit just right,
But these people walk ’round with wallets too light!”
So this Grump had a WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA.
It was to catch Santa, this clever idea.
If he could stop the big red guy in the sky,
Maybe the dreaded Christmas spirit would die.
He planned to use technology but he was surprised.
For Santa’s no Jacobite and knew of the heist.
You know this story, of cheerless small hearts
Misers who get kindness and their love starts.
Keep reading on to learn of Grump’s tricks
And see how Christmas season really ticks.
Taking out Christmas with Intelligent Technology
When The Grump got wind of Santa’s intelligent supply chain, he knew that trapping Santa and taking out Christmas would be more than stealing presents and silencing songs: he would need to fight tech with tech. He would need to lay a trap with constant monitoring to track Santa’s presence and snatch him when he was least expecting it. From GPS trackers and drones to sensors, The Grump would be on his technology A-game to keep those cookies uneaten and tree skirts uncovered.
The SeaConnect 370: The Perfect IIoT Tool
Unbeknownst to Sealevel, The Grump placed an order for our cellular Industrial Internet of Things (IIoT) monitoring device: the Sealevel SeaConnect 370. He had put together a plan — a sneaky little plan — and the SeaConnect 370 was at the heart of it.
He dressed up a family’s living room door with open/close door sensors and placed a pressure sensor at the bottom of the chimney floor. Just in case those failed to indicate anything, he attached a 1-Wire temperature sensor to Sealevel’s cold-chain monitoring device to detect any temperatures below 32 degrees F. If a cold blast blew, Santa would be on his way in, and the Grump would know it.
He configured the SeaConnect’s responsive, web-based interface to receive continuous updates for all three types of sensors. Using this interface, The Grump set up a text notification for the thermal sensor: if the temperature dropped too low, he would receive a text. From there, he could immediately enter the house and bag the big man.
He also used Sealevel’s SeaCloud SaaS, a powerful, cloud-based event engine and control software. The Grump created a series of automated notifications and tasks. If the “closed” door sensor registered as “open,” it would immediately notify The Grump of which door exactly had opened. Using control technology, he could close all the doors at an appropriate interval and lock them, trapping Santa in the tree room with the candlesticks.
Drone Tracking Santa Claus
To back up his snare lair plan, The Grump stole military drone technology to follow and track the Christmas Eve creeper. If Santa entered The Grump’s geofenced zone, the drone would home in on his location, delivering a visual of the sleigh to The Grump. Once the sleigh entered a specific perimeter within that area, the drone would engage in beach music warfare: playing unseasonal tunes from an onboard cellular sound system to drain the Christmas spirit powering Santa’s sleigh.
The drone’s onboard GPS sensors ensured The Grump could track the sleigh’s location continuously. Wherever the sleigh went down, the Grump could dispatch his artificially intelligent minions, SnowmoBOTS, to surround and escort jolly St. Nick to The Grump’s headquarters. From there, The Grump planned to loot the sleigh and sell the gifts over cryptocurrency networks.
Santa Isn’t a Jacobite
While we all love a good heist, The Grump was no more successful at stealing Christmas than his happily ever after’d cousin. Santa’s sleigh comes equipped with the state-of-the-art jamming technology and acoustic sensors. Santa knew about this airborne minion when his sensors heard its hum. As soon as the drone came up behind that red bumper, the sleigh scrambled the drone’s signals, and it dropped off.
Santa’s cozy red uniform also serves a purpose: this wearable device emits micro electromagnetic pulses that temporarily dismantle Wi-Fi systems, non-mechanical sensors, digital tools and other electronic devices when he enters homes. With a little North Pole magic, it even has flexible hybrid electronic sensors that coexist in the fabric that detect temperature. If the operational temperature gets too low, his suit material emits a warm, fuzzy feeling that keeps the place cozy. There’s no north wind when Santa comes in.
Merry Christmas Techies
While Sealevel’s device was exactly what The Grump needed, Santa made sure The Grump got exactly what he deserved. Totally foiled of his plans, The Grump broke out into a grin. Santa had given him the best gift of all: a bad day. Reminded of the joy of the evening and the big man’s big heart, The Grump headed out with a new start. He lightened his wallet at the nearest red kettle, and never doubted again his cousin’s mettle.
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